#and i dont know how to interact with like established friend groups so that is a whole other layer

[nintendc64]

why is trying to form human connections as an adult just an impossible task. both reaching out to old friends and trying to make new ones. am I doing something wrong

[magiccharmss]

i finished yellowjackets and i really wanted to talk about my interpretation of episode 9. now when i watched episode 9 for the first time, i was super confused by the interaction with travis. even with the explanation of the girls being on drugs, i didn’t understand the reasoning behind the writers writing something like that. but i have now after a week of not being over episode 10, come up with my interpretation of episode 9.

so for all of this to make sense, i need to establish my belief lottie was not supposed to be lottie at all in this scene. i believe that lottie was supposed to embody the wilderness, like possession. so when lottie initially says “he doesn’t belong to her”, i think that was supposed to show how the wilderness does not like jackie. taissa, van, shauna, jackie, nat, and misty all have this inherent dark nature that causes them to be consumed by the wilderness. they even attempt to keep this hidden for as long as possible. but if jackie were to stay alive, the girls humanity probably would have stayed. its the same reason the wilderness killed laura lee, they couldn’t have her alive because of how she would keep the girls sane. the difference between laura lee and jackie’s death, however, is how the wilderness took pity on laura lee. she never had to see any of the violence her friends perpetrated, and she died with her hope, faith, and love. jackie dies thinking shauna hates her, thinking her friends left her. so back to doom coming, when lottie says “he doesn’t belong to her,” i think that was either the wilderness trying to get rid of jackie’s hold on the girls, or the wilderness speaking to shauna about how she needs to leave jackie behind and submit to the hunger inside her. now another thing that really confused me was why taissa and van leave. taissa and van are 2 of the arguably most authentically ruthless and traumatized characters, so why would they leave? i believe that that was because van and taissa also wouldn’t have let things go that insane. i think because they were absent for the bulk of the violence, it allowed van and taissa, also characters who want to survive over everything , some room to have deniability in the groups actions. now the scene where they begin to assault travis REALLY weirded me out, but i think i know what they were trying to say in this situation. when lottie kissed travis, the wilderness was telling jackie directly you are not in charge anymore. jackie was the leader in civilization, she held a certain kind of respect. none of that exists in the wilderness. when shauna kisses travis, i think that was just high shauna trying to stick it to jackie about the jeff thing. it’s clear shauna has feelings for jackie of both platonic love, romantic love, and jealousy, so i think she was just trying to reenforce that. now for all the girls kissing travis, i think that was part of the trans girl travis narrative (whole other post). i dont believe that actually happened, i think the girls were attacking him the whole time and travis being higher than the lord above was hallucinating his own world, but when his body started to feel more and more pain the feeling snapped back. when travis starts running as the stag, i believe that the wilderness in lottie is mistaking the stag as jackie. like the stag was supposed to be jackie but ended up being travis. now when shauna is having hesitation and lottie says “it wants you to,” that can mean 2 things in my mind. its either the wilderness telling shauna that jackie has to go, or its the wilderness telling shauna to follow her murderous instincts. then nat shows up and badabingbadaboom travis stays alive, showing how shauna without the help of the wilderness could never harm “the stag” (jackie) anyway that’s it i just wanted to explain my thoughts because i saw a lot of people saying the girls sexually assaulted travis and i just dont believe that. the girls can be violent and murderous, but taking advantage of travis is something i dont believe they would do.

[themuse-if]

Hello! I just wanted to tell you I really enjoyed the demo so far. I am really into these college, slice-of-life IFs and the way you wrote is really easy to read/follow and indulge in.

I dont know if anyone already gave you the feedback but during „Never have I ever“ you can only choose one of the three options. I think there might be a coding mistake. Also maybe add a end screen so people know it is the end of the demo, I only say this because I had a few problems with my browser on a few IFs and couldnt move forward with the demo eventhough there was still content, so I was a bit unsure if this really was the end.

I do have a few feedback points but those are really personal preferences so please do not feel pressured by it. Its your story and you should write it how you like it. (Also I got feedback that I tend to formulate things kinda demanding so I just wanted to note that I dont mean it that way, I just havent figured out a way to write it differently but I try..)

- the MC seems pretty extrovert in the beginning but I saw you have a extrovert/introvert stat. Of course there is a possiblility of a set extrovert MC that grows introvert over the story but if that wasnt your intention maybe add a few introvert/extrovert choices in the beginning. I think the party is a really good thing for that.

- I, personally, dont drink alcohol and my MC doesnt either if I can have the choice. Maybe there could be a way to add that choice? Especially since it is underage drinking and I think a rule following, straight A-Student wouldnt drink underage, at least not much. I know we can refuse it at the „Never have I ever“ but at the „Truth or Dare“ we had to drink if we didnt want to answer the question. I get that is kinda the point but my friends used a really disgusting drink as a non-alcoholic version for these games so maybe that could be an option?

- in continuing from the previous point, that would open the option of having a perfect, shy MC that never drinks alcohol to a college student that makes a 180° turn which would open a lot of drama options. If that is something you are interested in of course.

Thats actually it. Again, please dont take this as a demand or anything. I adore your IF already and dont want to make you feel pressured into writing anything you dont want to. It is your story and you should write it how you want. I am just grateful to be able to read it (and for free (at the moment) nonetheless, so I really dont want to complain or anything.)

Also I just wanted to say I really adored the moment with Cameron, especially as they told us they are worried about us. It reminded me so much of my own older brother that I really was a bit teary eyed. I really am looking forward to see how our relationship continues at college and I want they will think about my romance choices (if they even notice it).

In general I am already looking very much forward for this IF. As I said I really like the way you write and formulate and I also am very happy about already having an established friend group and also a big happy family. I havent found a lot of IFs were that was the case. (Which I understand because I do like the family drama too..)

Anyway, I hope you have a great new year and all the best for you and your loved ones.

Hey! Thank you so much for all the feedback I really appreciate it. I know that currently it ends pretty abruptly but that will change with the next update.

On your point about how extroverted the MC is in the beginning, I think it's fitting because you mostly read about them interacting with people that they feel really comfortable around. Once they move to the dorms I think you'll have more opportunities to build a more introverted or standoffish MC.

And then about the drinking option I do have the option to not drink during never have I ever, I know the other alternatives are boring just being water or soda but I was thinking about the more straight edge MCs. During truth or dare on the other hand I see what you mean I'll try to add in a different penalty instead of taking a shot.

For storytelling purposes I give the MC options to sort of stick with Maxine which could be more fitting for a more introverted MC. Taking that path can be a lot more chill and lead to deeper chats and less partying.

Again thanks for the feedback. This is my first IF and it's been a really fun but also really challenging experience so far, so knowing that people are engaged enough to give me such in depth feedback is very encouraging.

[animeomegas]

hmmm i dont know how much youve interacted with him but any thoughts on rex? i adore him and marz a lot

I'm going to start with Marz because I know a lot more about her character! Okay, let me first establish how I view the Stratospheric ship, because I think it will help frame a lot of what I'm going to say. My interpretation is that they are:

A cult.

Failing completely at their attempt to remove class, gender roles, cultural differences etc. and their interest in trying shows ignorance to an absurd degree.

Selfish and creepy. Bringing people so young paired up like that as if they're breeding pairs of cattle, and having children aboard the ship even though they could have easily predicted the untold hardships that would have befallen them.

That's the overview to my opinion on the adults of the colony. Obviously those born on the ship or who were too young to consent, like Utopia, don't inherently fall under those critiques. I should also make it clear that this isn't a criticism of the game, as I believe this is a supported interpretation, and it's super interesting!

The way I view the children is inherently based in this backdrop. They are, mostly, tragic tales. They are victims of the circumstances forced upon them. Each of them is a tragic tale in a different way.

Marz is the tragic tale of someone who loves the Earth and who was denied the opportunity to experience it against her will. She loves the arts, fashion, the ideas of concerts and people and cities... And she gets none of that. She gets a society where survival takes so much energy, there isn't always space for the things she loves. In one of my playthroughs, she only remained Governor for a short while, because she prioritised art, but it simply wasn't feasible when base line survival needed all the attention.

And the adults decided to take a risk on colony life. She never did. And she has to live with the consequences.

(also, wtf is her augment??? Who thought that would be a good idea??? Shame is an important emotion for humans navigating social situations, developing their moral compass, and making friends???)

I really feel for Marz, because she yearns for something more. And the chance of it happening in her lifetime (if at all) just feels so slim.

...

Rex... I don't know as much about him tbh. I think the Heliopause are a group of... absolute nutters, para military dictatorship vibes all over the place. Although it's much more overt in the narrative than the negatives of the Stratos' way of life.

But I haven't found out Rex's backstory really. I think his bar idea is cool, and I love giving him hugs haha. His character design is probably my favourite haha. I'll have to update more specific thoughts when I actually befriend him properly!

[anonymous-dentist]

Hi anon, sorry to bring the sbi family fanfic discussion again and for the long post , (your posts ware what made realize why i hated this thing so much)

I don’t know if is the same type of fans but i noticed that some ficwritters that are really foucused on philza and wilbur (and sbi family i think?) Are kinda trying to add cellbit to this situation? Like i read some philza focused fanfic where he interacts with cellbit and the ficwritters act like cellbit is his kid? Its weird idk how to explain very well (this is also the same people that kinda write cellbit as a native english speaker (american and european) and not a brazilian (its something that is too hard to explain right now)

And its kinda stressing me out because cellbit is written in such a weid way and its infesting the spiderbit tag lol and i dont understand what is going on half of the time since idk what the hell sbi even is (brazilian with 0 understanding about english speaking mcty)

Sorry for the long post

Oh yeah no I don’t really get it but like. I also do! Because q!Phil has become one of only a literal handful of people on the island to actually properly trust q!Cellbit and so they’re like. Friends. But obviously you can never just be friends with someone not your age and so. Fandom assigned family dynamic. It’s super weird and lowkey like. Idk it’s just weird lol.

A discussion surely must follow!

First, a brief rundown of SBI:

SBI is Sleepy Boys Inc., a group made of up streamers Philza, Wilbur Soot, Tommyinnit, and Technoblade. (Originally it was just Phil, Wilbur, and Techno, but Tommy wiggled his way in somehow.) They’re Best Friends, but somewhere along the way their fandoms said. Fuck it. Family dynamic… mostly because the ccs lowkey thought it was funny and ran with it. Wilbur alone would rather die than not have Philza Minecraft be his father

This dynamic spread to their characters on the dsmp despite them literally not once ever referring to each other all as family; iirc Techno himself said he at least wasn’t part of the family because that dynamic would be fucked up after all the shit his character did to both c!Wilbur and c!Tommy. But c!Phil was c!Wilbur’s father even though he did fully murder his ass, and Wilbur and Tommy were brothers because they’re Wilbur and Tommy and you’d have to kill them to stop them from being brothers. Tommy was never established to be c!Phil’s son, and Phil never seemed to consider him one

But then the dsmp started dying around summer 2021 and everyone was kinda just left with fanon, and SBI fanon can get weird. I’m talking borderline fetishistic nuclear family stuff, especially when you get into ‘Dark SBI’ content with Phil kidnapping Tommy or whatever and forcibly making them family? It gets weird, take a look through the tag sometime

The thing with a lot of these fics is that like. It’s gotten to a point where it’s a fandomized version of both cc! and c!SBI with some really freaky characterizations and some really diehard fans. I’ve talked about that before, so I won’t do it again.

The weirdest thing I’ve noticed about these fics, though- and this goes back to what we were talking about with Cellbit inexplicably being added to the mix all of a sudden- is that everybody has to be a family.

You’ll be hard pressed to find a SBI fic where the characters have friends. Even Tubbo and Ranboo, usually delegated to a ‘Tommy’s friend!’ role despite them not interacting much like as a group ever are treated either as extensions of Tommy himself or as his found family ‘brothers’ who Phil also inevitably helps take care of rather than as friends, and they act that way. Niki isn’t usually ever written in as Wilbur’s friend, she’s Benchtrio’s sister/mother-figure, or she’s described as Wilbur’s found family sister. Jack Manifold? Lumped in with Niki with Benchtrio as their older brother/father-figure. Quackity? Either Wilbur’s boyfriend, thus a member of the family, or Tommy’s older brother/father-figure.

Even characters who never really interacted with SBI as a “family” on the dsmp get this treatment: you’ll read an SBI fic with c!Purpled in it and he’ll be Tommy’s brother figure. c!Sam is Tommy’s father figure. Schlatt is Tommy’s uncle or Wilbur’s brother. Puffy is an aunt. Sapnap and Dream? Tommy’s brother or father figures. Even Hannah is being written as Tommy’s cool older sister figure these days despite only really interacting with him once on the smp

And you can see this kind of behavior continuing now in the qsmp fandom… if the new ccs/characters in question aren’t “problematic”. Chayanne can’t see Techno as a personal hero, he has to see him as an older brother or an uncle. Tubbo is Phil and Fit’s son and Tommy’s brother. Niki is Tallulah’s mom. Quackity is Wilbur’s boyfriend.

What you’ll actually be hard pressed to see is this kind of dynamic with Phil and other, “problematic” ccs, aka ccs who aren’t like. English ccs.

Because you won’t find q!Forever included in the family dynamics despite him basically being q!Phil’s best friend and closest confidant. It took longer for q!Missa to be added to Phil’s wiki page than it did for Techno to despite them literally being explicit canon husbands, and you’ll be lucky if Missa is even mentioned in a “qsmp” SBI fic. Etoiles? Not even mentioned despite him and Phil more or less actually leaning into the family dynamic with the “brothers” thing. Even Tallulah and Chayanne are left out or mischaracterized in “qsmp” SBI fics, giving Tommy the spotlight.

You won’t find nearly anybody who isn’t an English cc in these fics, and this is NOT accusing anyone of xenophobia. It’s most likely just because the SBI people are used to watching only Phil or only Wilbur and they don’t speak enough of the other languages to really care about the non-English ccs and thus disregard their characters and lore. It’s not just SBI people who do this, it’s plenty of people speaking every language on the server not watching anyone whose languages they don’t speak. Yk?

But that brings us to q!Cellbit, and I’m surprised the SBI guys have latched onto him the way they did considering he’s everything they seem to dislike: his first language isn’t English, he doesn’t talk with Phil a lot, he and Tallulah get along really well, he makes fun of Wilbur being gone. And, honestly? The SBI guys did hate him for a long time because of those things, they constantly undermined his efforts and said Phil would be a better Order leader and said that he should never speak to Tallulah again because he was making her sad and he’s friends with their least favorite person ever, Forever.

But then q!Phil said he trusted Cellbit, and it’s like a switch was flipped. Starting around the Pills Arc when they first teamed up, SBI people were suddenly on board with Cellbit despite being part of the haters literally days before. Why? Well. Phil and Cellbit are friends now, and so now he gets the privilege of being in the fics.

The problem with this is that these people have never watched Cellbit. They’ve seen ten minutes of him total from Phil’s pov, and that’s all they’re going to use to write his character. So of course there will be mischaracterization.

And, of course, they’ll be family. Because, as I said, there’s this weird allergy to the concept of friendship in SBI fics. You’re family or you’re an enemy.

Constant fanon mischaracterization of Phil has basically turned him into a universal father figure even if he doesn’t have that dynamic with the characters he’s like the “father” of. q!Cellbit’s only familial figure outside of his actual canon family is generally seen as q!Bad, who even referred to him as family last night on stream. But, because Phil and Cellbit are friends now and Cellbit is younger than Phil is, they have to have a father-son dynamic, because that’s what Phil’s only character trait is in the SBI fics he’s in. He’s the dad whether it makes sense or not.

If that makes sense.

[sentofight]

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa 💕 Lyn and Zech.

Have we discussed shipping before?: yes || no [not really but u wink wonked one time i think and i was like *idiot mode ehe~*]

My interest level overall: I’ve wanted this for so long || can’t wait || I think it’ll be fun || kinda feeling it || maybe with a lot of plotting || I need to think about it || not interested, sorry

i'm interested because YOU HYPED ME UP WHEN I ADDED LYN SO NOW I WANNA KNOW IF THEY WORK OR NOT TOGETHER HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM i blame u for the good things. but for my brain sake slow and plotting is better. i can envision them but im scared because no brakes in this big pot called brain.

How we should do this: jump right in || slow burn || pre-established || build up to it in a thread || anything goes

tbh im rusty with her that's why taking it slow would be better so i can write her better in the future interactions. also when it comes with ocs it is better to go slow to not seem like things are being forced;; u know ;u; i trust u and zech but i dont trust my brain XD also not fun past experience u know ;a;

Dynamics I want to try out with our ship: friends to lovers || rivals to lovers || enemies to lovers [this could be a thing if he was hired as a mercenary to another group but he is stuck with da eliwood gang lol] || mutual pining || battle couple small yehaw || childhood friends || high school sweethearts || star crossed lovers || long time lovers || old married couple || newlyweds || sickeningly sweet couple || secret lovers?????? || fake dating/marriage????? i mean we can think of stuff :thinking: || best friends hiding their feelings || arranged marriage || soulmates || other

Shipping Interest Check! | accepting | @wayward-sword

Send 💕 (or “hearts!” if the symbol doesn’t show up) and I’ll fill out the following for our muses:

[petrichor-idyllic]

Listen, I know that y'all are here for my TMR content, but at least one of you has asked me for an OBX piece and I'm going through a phase, so I thought I'd say my piece on this.

A think a main point of tension in the fan base atm the moment is Jiara (Kiara x JJ).

Now- I would like to clarify that I love the show, and I really like Kie as a character, and even though JJ is my favourite character, I'm not a delusional fangirl who dislikes their relationship because of that.

I, at the end of season 2, actually really liked them and thought they would make a cute couple.

But, as of season 3, I do not like them together.

Hear me out.

I, personally (as in this is my opinion pls dont shout at me), do not like them in season 3.

My main problem with the show and the relationships in the group is that it is incredibly heteronormative - which also increased with Cleo joining the group (I absolutely love Cleo she is an icon I have no problems with her). But like, a friend group with the same amount of boys and girls does not mean that everyone has to pair up. People can just be mates. And while the cast is obviously very diverse, which is brilliant we love to see it, there is not one slightly queer character in the show.

And, Madison Bailey, who plays Kiara, literally has a girlfriend in real life. Idk maybe I will just die on the headcanon hill that Kie is a lesbian because she is an interesting character and I do not care about the whole relationship drama between her and the boys.

Another point people keep arguing over is that Kie and JJ was forced.

And like, no, it wasn't- we've been seeing them subtly flirt for 2 seasons. It's been made obvious that JJ obviously has feelings for Kie; literally in the first episode. And, after season 2, it's clear Kie likes him too.

But, it does feel forced.

Like, it's established they like each other, but they've always liked each other and have gotten into the most horrendous situations without saying anything. So why now?

JJ feels normal - but Kie feels kinda out of character. Like, maybe she just had enough and couldn't hold back anymore, like, girl, I get you. But they used to have good, flirty but friendly energy, and it feels like the writers were forcing tension between them. Which is extra annoying cause it's at the expense of my boy Pope.

Also, just throwing it out there, the whole "I love you, dude" scene didn't even process as a love confession to me - it was only JJ's reaction that made me realise. I think it's because me and my mates say we love each other all the time and the "dude" made it feel like her just trying to convince him she cares over having genuinely strong feelings for him.

Though the Kitty Hawk rescue was peak from JJ and absolutely that I expected their romantic relationship to be- it's just everything before that.

And don't get me started on the time skip.

It's some really bizarre writing. Like, they make sense, but the way it all went down just doesn't make sense to me for some strange reason.

Idk how to explain it. It feels rushed, like whilst they've been friends for years, we didn't really see any progress or realisation from Kiara's side. Like, maybe a scene where she talks to Sarah about it and says she doesn't know what to do and she thinks she's starting to fall for JJ could've made it feel less... off. Something as simple of that could've really added to it in my opinion. Like, we didn't see Kie's feelings for JJ outside of their interactions with each other.

If that makes sense, I'm struggling to explain here.

I hope yall get me here lmao.

[spooky-k1d]

pleasepleaseplease if you have any information about earth 939 squip i would love to hear it even if it's just rehashing old info. also !!!!! if you have anything on the relationships between the squipverse crew i would love to hear all of that i wanna know how they all interact so bad

OKAY HI im sorry im answering so late i kept forgetting about this lolz Anywho

for personality / how he interacts with earth-8002 jeremy i'd say he has the sass and silliness of the canon squips Though he obvs isnt a supercomputer and isnt like abusive 😭😭😭 though he still will give jeremy shit for posture and manners but just as a mom scolding her kid

also i ended up actually coming up with a name for him: akira sakamoto Cus i didnt wanna have to specify his earth everytime and also itd be weird if his name was Squip UH he works at alchemex and also has a master's in chemistry & biotechnology, master's in physics, and a bachelor's in mathematical science. also at some point in the story he's probably wanted by the police (might share the reason at some point not sure !!!)

as for their relationships lets first establish where they all stand in spider-society

earth-93 jeremy: one of their programmers and basically main IT guy, though is also in the founder's close group of who they take on missions (so basically he's kind of high up in the ranking)

earth-4600 jake, earth-8002 jeremy: theyre just your average spider society member, they go around capturing anomalies and shit, nothing too special

earth-939 squip: same as the last one but also has his own lab in spider hq and earth-93 jeremy does basically all his work in there so theyre like kind of partner-colleagues

okay so basically earth-93 jeremy is work-friends with akira, he tried to just stay solely professional and friendly at first but they eventually became actual friends and have hung out outside of spider hq once or twice. earth-93 jere sees earth-8002 jere as sort of an annoying child and just tries to mostly ignore him. earth-4600 jake is his closest friend and jake will sometimes stop in while he's working and chat and they hangout the most outside of hq, though they actually dont talk *that* much at hq because jake is always out doing missions

akira and earth-8002 jeremy have this weird peter b parker/miles morales dynamic, its sort of fatherly but also not really. idk if youve seen the movies you mostly know what im talking about when i say pbp/miles morales dynamic

akira, earth-8002 jeremy and earth-4600 jake never really interact with each other much but theyre friendly w/ each other

also again if youve seen ATSV you know how lyla kind of is apart of HQ and thats what earth-93 squip is like And everyone really likes her cus she'll sometimes just go around and talk to people and help them figure things out Though she always annoys earth-93 jeremy and he really wishes she had a physical form so he could punch her LMFAO

[ghostys-originals]

RKZ Fandom Boundaries/ Consent

Ive seen some creators make these boundary lists as of late and although I’ve accepted that I cannot control what a fandom does, I believe its at least important to vocalize my boundaries so there is no confusion in the future.

This is mainly about Roadkillerz, but can be extended to apply to whatever else I make in the future!

[CW: Brief mentions of nsfw topics, p*dophillia, and other problematic subjects common in fandom, will also briefly mention hate speech]

1. Fan Merch/art/fic/etc

- Although I would prefer if you financially supported me first, I do not mind the creating and selling of fan merch such as art prints, stickers, etc!

- With that said, I will discuss what I am personally comfortable with seeing depicted:

1a. Hate Speech

- I do not encourage the promotion of hate speech such as lgbtq+ phobia, racism, sexism, anti semitism, etc using my work/characters as the face for that. Not only does it directly go against my own values, but for RKZ specifically, goes against the intended themes of the series (nazi “punks” are posers)

- On the topic of politics, I dont mind the promotion of, love speech? I guess? I dont know how the groups affected would feel about fandomifying important issues, but if you want to use RKZ characters for political stances that dont fall under hate speech go for it. Pro-lgbtq fan works for example is fair game.

1b. NSFW

- To be super blunt: I do not mind NSFW content as a concept, majority of my characters are of age (18+) unless stated otherwise.

- I, however, will expect some very basic criteria:

One, I do not feel comfortable with ships between family members, adult/children, etc. I dont want to encourage ship discourse since anything can be considered abusive, but as long as its NEITHER of those two things I do not care.

Two, Please be a responsible ADULT (no minors are permitted to publicly post nsfw content of my work) and keep any nsfw art/fanfiction out of the main tags. I understand minors will still seek out content not meant for them, but there are also people (not just minors either) who want to be able to scroll through a tag without seeing something they dont want to. Sex is about consent, and if your work doesnt include at LEAST a warning of some kind that aint good.

Overall just have some common sense, and if you do see people doing these things please dont debate them- just block and move on. I hate it too but getting into flamewars isnt productive and you’ll just be angry and you’ll never change their minds. Bonus thing: love yourself, care for yourself

Ok I think thats the most i’ll put for that? Now for things unrelated to content

2. Staff interactions

2a. I am alright with having a casual back and forth with fans, however I highly discourage developing parasocial relationships. If you wish to be my friend, you HAVE to treat me like a person. I do not respond well to idol-worship or lovebombing. I’ve had many bad experiences with people being super weird with that. I am not saying this to be rude, but I can and will block you if you make me feel uncomfortable, spam my DMs, or do anything else that I believe oversteps my comfort. I prefer to not befriend fans anyway since that promotes power dynamics, plus the before mentioned idol-worship which just makes me feel inhuman, so do not get your hopes up

EDIT: ALSO THIS SHOULD GO WITHOUT SAYING, But do not attempt to block evade/cyberstalk either. It WILL not end well for you. (if you want to know what counts as cyberstalking, it should be at the point where you dedicate your life to finding out literally everything about a person- casually checking my socials is fine as long as it doesnt absorb your life)

Cyberstalking and block evading are a clear rejection of established boundaries and if you participate in that, then you are just scum. Theres no woke twist you can put on it to justify it. Its wrong no matter how you feel about somebody.

2b. With that said, please do not harass anybody involved with the production of Roadkillerz/Other works including VAs, friends, friend of friends, etc. Please remember that they are humans too and have the right to privacy and healthy relations like anybody else.

2c. Fetish mining/sharing nsfw content/etc: Even though I said I dont mind NSFW content, I still do not consent to receiving sexual messages from strangers that includes but are not limited to sexting/flirting, sending nsfw art/fics, irl photos in a sexual manner, requesting I draw fetish material like Sam wearing a straight jacket (TRUE STORY, BY THE WAY.), etc.

If i think of anything else I’ll add to this but for now I believe this should be enough.

[maryotism]

mario KNOWS how they feel about him but he of course stashes those emotions deep down. he has to play the big dumb happy guy whose willing to take a bullet for someone hahahaaaaaaa

This builds until eventually an arguement breaks out and he unlocks his avatar powers then idk runs away to go live w/ sanic th hoghedge or somethin

THSI IS SO FUNNY HELLO sanic and maryo ... Helle yea

HONESTLY i think maryo would start to think a little Too hard about things . like he would watch all his friends get along and think like Wow why cant that be me ...

of course he has meggy and luigi but even they have their moments (plus luigi is his brother so their bond is already established .... maryo wants friends)

and the meme guardians .... he was never really close with 3 ... but 4 ....... Hoo boy . 4 has been getting real tired of maryo lately .

maryo probably feels a little isolated from everyone since hes so . Different ? maybe he wonders why people dont like him that much . maybe he wonders why someone like bob can get a ride or die friend (boopkins) and he cant

IS THIS MAKJNG SENSE idk anymore . i feel like if it ever did build up and explode it would be through maryo talking to meggy about it and meggy severely fucking up

i wrote a little scenario on it and i posted a snippet of it i think . initial idea is that maryo is gazing at everyone having fun in their own little groups and wonders aloud 'i wish they liked me more' then meggys like ? 'they do like you ...!! its just that youre .... yknow ...' 'what ? Too Much ?'

i think about that one interaction between 4 and luigi in My Roommate Mario a lot .

'your brothers just too hard to live with' 'haha yeah... hes a handful'

?!?!?!?!?! Fucked up !!!!!!!!!!! maryo the true autism creature end post

[fagoutboy]

i get what u mean with it being painful to see ppl talking ab being friends w their mutuals. i struggle a lot with knowing how to initiate and sustain social interactions especially when it feels like everyone already has established friend groups. i don’t understand where ppl make all these friends how to people talk to each other. social media is hard.

yea thats a lot of my problems too i just dont even know how to like. begin and im so bad at dms... its nice to know im not alone in this but i wishyou luck too. we will make it 🫶

[memurfevur-archive]

ya know sometimes im inclined to kill off characters because i dont use them!

but the problem is now i thinking up of so many dynamics now that said character is DEAD

liahne!!!! liahne couldve gotten along with so many people! Shuska, Avonis, Kulsot obviously, hell maybe Akidis and co too like

I wouldn’t say Liahne is my most friendly and approaching Troll but she’s much more calm and friendly than a bunch of others that I have. She is literally a cottage core bisexual who is so so patient with people and lowkey misses her days at the caverns caring for kids. Tht said she wouldn’t have traded her experiences for the world. Well, except for Omnius... ya know...

If you had any problems you could come to her and she’d willingly listen to what you had to say. She’d make you tea or lemonade and comfort you and she wouldn’t think twice about it. But she’s not a pushover and she’s not really someone who lets people walk over her. She is, however, self sacrificial and would rather Fix Problems Herself rather than letting anyone else help if she thinks their help is unnecessary-- which we saw how well THAT went when she went to kill Omnius and failed so, so miserably.

Liahne is still around on the blog, but as a ghost now. But because she’s a ghost I feel like I very much limited her ability to interact with people. But then again I aimed to kill her off for good, the only logical reason why she’s around is because I have friends with characters who love her and ghosts have already been a pre-established thing in my lore for a long time. So did I really kill her off? LOL

But ugh. yes. i am thinking about hypotheticals. Liahne and Avonis could have EASILY known each other because they were from the same cavern!! But in canon ofc they didn’t interact and ofc they don’t actually know each other because Avonis is not an auxiliatrix like Piomor and Liahne were, so his responsibilities and social group were different. Liahne and Shuska I think would have been fun if only I had the brain for it before I killed her gfdlgfdg. I think her and Shuska are very similar, that is all. Her and Akidis I’m ??? about but I can see it. Similar enough I think but different in approach. I would say Akidis is more patient than Liahne for sure not to mention Akidis is my WIFE and Liahne is not (takes every opportunity i can to shower akidis with love, gods i love her GODS I LOVE HER -froths at the mouth- )

Not to mention uhhh lowkey shipped her mentally with some other characters but Liahne’s a bit complicated when it comes to quadrants o+<

oh god Piomor doesnt even know shes dead... that was Piomor’s little girl ;-; her kid, her apprentice, her pride and joy ough UGH -feral noises-

[abyssal-system]

It's late and we can't sleep so I thought I might as well use this blog for its actual intended purpose for once (a diary), so this post might be a little all over the place. im sort of stream-of-consciousness'ing this.

block the tag "#personal" if you dont want to see (potentially sad) personal ramblings / posts from us. be safe, curate your dash, i understand.

things have been very quiet system-wise lately. i think we have a new(?) alter but I'm not sure How new or why they split. I'm not even really sure if its not my imagination tricking me into mistaking an already established headmate as a new split...

i've been thinking about them for a little bit. They seem to go by Hadal (though thats also just a catch-all name for the system when we dont know whos fronting) and i have a sneaking suspicion that they've posted on this blog before.

I havent been dissociating as much lately which is good but ive also not been switching at all which is... not a bad thing really, i guess, but it certainly doesnt help ease my fears of Being A Faker.

i know that systems have quiet periods, and i know that me being frontstuck and also unwilling to change that (fear of loss of control is a pain) so thats probably the reason why, but its still unnerving being the only one around.

ive also been thinking about the logistics of getting a diagnosis... I have a lot of fears about the medical system and abuse within it, particularly being stuck in a mental health facility against my will with no way out. its prevented me from coming out as a system to my parents (who... I feel like theyd understand. not Understand, but im not in any danger if they know. i just worry itll change our relationship in some way, like they wont think im Me anymore) and its prevented me from seeking treatment and understanding of my disorder.

the online system community is also rife with toxicity and misinformation and i do not whatsoever feel safe interacting with people who seem to snap at others without warning, so I dont have many system friends out of fear of reliving past friend group drama

I imagine that the feeling of total isolation I feel is common among other systems, but it doesn't really help to know that. my near-debilitating anxiety controls every part of my life and prevents me from seeking help when i otherwise would have.

it also doesnt really help that the one time i tried to find a dissociation specialist, the only one i could find that said they were queer friendly was 4 hours away in another state.

... i might look again. I might just tell my parents so they can help me look for a therapist.

I worry about that though. I worry that since my plurality doesnt really impact my life all that much (i dont switch very often, I dont have amnesia barriers, and i dont lose control of my body fully when i switch out) that either means Im Faking or Its Not Bad Enough To Worry My Parents Over. Its Not Bad Enough To Drive Across The State To See A Therapist For It when i have a perfectly decent one less than 30 minutes away

... i dont know. it feels like i have all the pieces to get the ball rolling on ... Something? but im not really sure if its worth it. we barely have enough money to keep the pantry full for a week, let alone to switch therapists and drive for hours just so i can Maybe get coping mechanisms or something.

.... I dont really know how to end this. i hope this wasnt too negative for this blog, i know i try to focus on positivity and lighthearted subjects.

please be kind in the notes. there is a (very scared) person behind the screen and I am trying to be better about opening up about my worries. kind advice is always welcome though! if it doesnt help me it could potentially help somebody else.

[introspectiveconfessions]

“maybe if I wasn’t so into the idea that I have to be depressed to make good art then I would make more of it.”

a discussion by an anonymous loser girl who can’t decide how to define herself or if she should even try to define herself. 🫶🏽

hello void! Long time, no posts! There is nothing satisfying or interesting happening in my life at this particular moment so I’m gonna try ONCE AGAIN to document things on this godforsaken hellscape of an internet. Maybe texting things out instead of picking up a legitimate pen will help me to journal/blog. “What’s the purpose of blogging?” the void asks. Great question, void. My answer is simple. I DONT FUCKING KNOW. I need to get these thoughts out bc why tf not I guess but also maybe someone else will relate? Maybe I’ll find community? Maybe I’ll just be another data point that’s ignored by everyone? Idk dude. I’m tired and I want to complain. Is that okay with you? No? Who cares. I’m doing it anyways and tbh I never asked for your opinion and even if I did I’m not sure I would care about it until late at night when I begin to think about every interaction I’ve ever had.

Let’s talk about ME

My least favorite but also my favorite subject. I’ve been watching a lot of video essays and thought daughter tiktoks as of late and I’ve come to the conclusion that I think I’m a loser. A girl failure, a femcel, a weird woman… if you will or if you won’t. So the thing is, I grew up adjacent to American School culture but not in it, just an observer of it. This has done wonders for my psyche bc I was able to establish myself as an archetype whenever I wanted but never had the data to back up my validity. Am I poser? Most definitely. I did not have the social standing in my community to fit into a specific group and become defined. There was no status quo for me to chase. It was just me, on the bleachers. I was watching every other child and adolescent close to my age find their social standing and redefine it, get lost in it, or be rejected by society! And I was merely an observer, a fan, an audience member. So now as an adult I am surrounded by individuals who had that opportunity and they’ve moved past the implications of high school. But does high school ever end? I wouldn’t know bc high school wasn’t something I did. Was I jock? Was I a nerd? Was I a theater kid? (I definitely was not a theater kid.) but I never knew and I certainly don’t know now! Is it relevant? Probably not. But I’m having trouble finding an identity in which I can relate to people with, that is excluding my close circle of friends of course. All of this has become a burgeoning thought bc I started a new job, I’m planning to go back to school, and the schools I am entertaining are NO where near my current home. Meaning within a year or two, I will be in an entirely different community and having to introduce myself to strangers as a no name, no identity, no social standing… loser/person. All of which has never stopped me before, but… it’s been on my mind more presently than it ever has before. I have always been fine as an observer. It’s quite exciting to see how people interact with each other especially when they are forced into a situation in which they never would have otherwise interacted with each other.

What do I mean when I say I am a loser? To provide clarification, I don’t mean it in a negative context. I think of myself as an outlier in my community. My thoughts and opinions are somewhat in opposition of the cultural norm. My interests are more closely aligned with characterizations of a “‘morally bankrupt woman”. I call that reality but that’s not everyone’s reality. Here are the facts.

- my screen time is laughably high.

- I’m obsessed with off putting things

- I have no interest in aligning myself with trends

- I’m a big fan of being leisurely

- I like ugly things

This all kind of reads like a loser. I’m successful at keeping a job, I can win at certain things in life. But I definitely have had my fair share of failures. Can I make a friendship or relationship last? Sometimes but my history is kind of… it’s not great. Am i interested in improving those odds? I think it would be remiss to say… nah, I really don’t care. Fuck it we ball. ✌🏽

lol I also can’t even ball. I’m sure if I put in the practice I could be an average athlete but my feet are so uncoordinated they barely walk correctly.

Why am I talking about being a loser so much? Idk it’s been on my mind maybe bc I feel like a walking contradiction as of late. If you looked at me and made a snap judgement, loserdom isn’t exactly the vibe I give off. But I definitely feel like I’m an incognito loser. 🧐

Dude. Upon writing that last sentence… I came to the conclusion I have IMPOSTER SYNDROME. Jesus Christ, how much more of a loser CAN I GET. 😫That’s literally so typical I’m gonna have to commit an action of death agains myself. Character assassination…

More like character: ass of the nation amiright ladies?

Fuck. Someone take me out back. I need to stfu. Anyways that is my headspace will comment more later. I’m kind of invested in this finding Nemo ambiance video I got going on rn. It’s literally sea life with the soundtrack of finding Nemo in the background. I’m obsessed. Brb I gotta drink a coke and play solitaire with this massive vibe I’ve bequeathed myself with.

btw my title is very misleading. I’m not talking about art at all unless you consider me art. My character as a form of art? Bruh. If my character was an art style I just know it would be something so pretentious.

[paragonrobits]

some of my thoughts when I've approached vague team-creation ideas that have stalled because i genuinely dont know how to approach them:

"My main team of characters is fairly well established, plus or minus some additions I'm considering for specific sub-continuities or scenarios to play around in. I should create other teams for them to interact with! Not enemies or even serious rivals, just a few different teams to be friendly characters that sometimes work together with JOLLY COOPERATION, sometimes fight them in tournaments or raid bosses but mostly are good-natured friends."

"They compete against each other, and no matter who wins, they then have barbecue on the beach."

"okay but my main squad are characterized as being cheesy, gleefully weird and dirty turbo-gremlins who gather similar weirdos to them. So what should the other groups be? Okay I might draw inspiration from high fantasy stuff; if my main character are Warcraft Horde, these guys are Warcraft Alliance. So what does that look like?"

"...SHOOT. I don't actually know the vibe for that; all my ideas just feel kind of generic. I guess I could take standard fantasy concepts but make the dwarves echidna-snakes and the elves hive-mind colonies of beetles but I dont know how to do the whole thing on a bigger scale."

"Okay. I could make these teams based more on what OTHER people find appealing, not just me. But I don't know where to go with that, either! Just asking my dashboard what they like hasn't yielded the kind of results I'm hoping for and there isn't really a resource for finding the most popular general ideas or concepts, so far as I know."

"What do people LIKE? People who aren't me, I mean. They like... romance, I guess? Stylish characters? Dogs? Should I... make a team focused on stylish characters with an emphasis on speed and technique instead of the brute force MONSTER MODE ENGAGED of my main characters??"

"...Will people like it if, I dunno, i make a bunch of characters with cool concepts like 'vampire ghost pirate lady' or 'uplifted dog operating a suit of giant armor and is also a knight', and one of them is a talking non-anthropomorphic bear? maybe more pirates for the romantic vibe but also implying they're a sea based civilization."

"Hrm. Based on my experiences people really like vampires so maybe I could do something with a civilization that is akin to an enlightened high fantasy civilization of nobility and honor but its visuals are gothic honor and its populated by Creature of the Black Lagoon fishmen, bio-punk Frankenstein things, and vampires. a LOT of vampires that are very pretty."

[qhostpi22]

alright lets try this again, gonna speed run the first part.

ethan is afraid of felix because he's ethan + because felix is a jerk. it does not take much for ethan to be scared of someone or something, and felix is particularly eccentric. So i don't think this is hinting at felix having like a really evil side moreso than it is cody/ethan being just slightly overdramatic, like almost all jocks are shown to be. on the same note, i don't think cody is scared of felix, or ever was.

okay so evil justin, im gonna be honest i don't know what this part of the rant is about. please elaborate on that.

james left justin not just because he thought he was gay but because james is shown to sorta have a bit of a grudge against both justin and cody. James is pretty much always beeing demeaning towards justin when they interact. Its also why justin is not worried about james in the end, they do not have a good relationship in general. james thinking justin is gay could be part of it but i don't think it's supposed to be the main point. james in general seems to be disconnected from his group, he doesn't really get along with most of them and has always something bad to say about them. Not afraid to trash talk his supposed friends. It feels like he only hangs out with them for school status and because of edward, and now that he is having trouble with edward aswell he distances himself even more.

i don't think felix is blackmailing or threatening ethan and evil justin. Evil justin is just loyal to felix because he has fucked up ideas of what cool is, also felix is rich. evil justin doesn't seem threatened by felix so i believe he is with him cuz he wants to be. as for ethan we established that he at the very least is intimidated by felix, i think he sorta looks up to him. ethan still cares for cody yes, but i don't think felix started purposefully feeding him lies about cody like the fucking witch in rapunzel. i think felix just going "cody betrayed the packe by leaving grr" would be enough. ethan most likely sees cody leaving felix as a personal betrayel. cody didn't just leave felixs group he also left ethan behind.

i think most of the football team are passive felix supporters so he definetly could have gotten some random npc to drop james justin and louis, or one of the omce he created. im not sure how far into the chapter this happens so i think it one of the two.

evil justin has a grudge against normal justin because they share the same name and he has a complex about it. Evil justin is the one with the extra prefix to seperate him from normal justin, which makes him feel inferior and less important since clearly just his name is not enough. when someone says justin we instantly think of normal justin, not evil justin.

i also dont get the last theory part, elaborate on that too pls.

devi jock soap opera rant below (ft burger) heavy tw (leaving out the isaac rant for good reasons, dont add that pls burger @over-dvse)

i cant get over this me and burger will be continuing the reading some other time but genuinely why is ethan so afraif of wolfe he thinks felix is going to destroy cody (he didnt, obviously, his main focus IS edward because hes a freak but we love you wolfe you early 2000's goofy ass supervillian) and if he DID destroy cody, you'd think cody would be like,,, long gone at this point. it seems like cody really just wants to get ethan out of a presumbly bad situation in which we have NO context of why ethan would feel and/or think such a horrible way about felix in any way. sure, he doesn't seem to show concern in jock soap opera for ANY of the cronies; but they were clones, so maybe it would be different as if they were real people? i mean he did keep his main team (aka brandon, evil justin and ethan) inside where they could possibly safe and Justin2 did say the football team shared the power; so why is ethan so afraid of felix? maybe its his lust for power? i'm not sure what happened to make him feel such a way,,, and honestly; felix with the way felix is he could have destroyed cody WAYYYY back when cody wasnt even apart of eds gang. the fact that ethan began crying when he started to shoot cody with the 'giant machine nerf gun' (very effective felix…) means there was possibly something felix said to ethan about cody or something either because he was 'showing signs of leaving' or he felt insecure about cody standing up to him; so what he COULD have done was tell ethan that cody is a traitor and said everything bad about him because he was mad. he may have not meant that all, in all honest he shows little care for cody currently, so why is ethan so afraid of him? i know felix has a tempermant problem (that much is obvious) but you'd never think he would do such horrible actions to scare someone he likely kept in the wolfe manor safe to the point he betrayed, and i quote, 'my best bro…'

not just that, evil justins weird thing to jump at nicer justin IN A BOOKCASE LIBRARY is fucking WILD because if you look to the thing with the two of them in the food shaft thing, it specifically writes that Justins heart was increasing being so close to Louis' face; so OBVIOUSLY justin2 he's a fucking homosexual in some way shape or form. also i dont think hes taken like,,, any interest in niki so i think evil justin is definitely as justin puts it, 'you shouldn't take drugs man, not cool' - on something or has something stuck into head just like ethan did. or maybe carver leaps to conclousions just like wolfe does, and thats why he has his loyalty so bad is because they have common traits. felix is so set on destroying ed, and his lust for power, to the point i dont think anyones picking up the clues with how fucking goofy that chapter was.

and when James stormed off down the hall as soon as he got a chance to leave Justin, and we ALL know how Jameson "James" Blackburn feelings towards gay people are, that is probably a reason he ditched Justin in the first place. When Justin DOES get out (pretty easily may iadd, evil justin you are such a horrible 2000's supervillian too) he only worries of louis and if he's okay; there is nothing of 'oh i hope james is okay!' its the focus on louis.

and if you notice, the number THREE is codys lucky number as stated; so he pressed the button he PRESUMEABLY thought was three (we love you cody) and low and behold, there stood Ethan waiting for him. them being so close back then would lead ethan to KNOW codys favorite number (maybe felix too dont think that was the case because evil justin just showed tf up so ethan probably did too) and would LIKE to see him, but of course with ethan being ethan his anxiety and fears gripped him like a high-flying prey bird catching fish and couldnt contain his composure when cody tried to reason with him. the problem with that is, i believe felix is either using something against his friends so they stay on his side in some way shape or form because he's afraid he's going to be lonely; which oh my god if he is thats absolutely horrible DO NOT DO THAT i beg, that means it could be leading ethan and carver to do such actions. ethan obviously still cares for cody, you can tell because he starts crying over the fact he has to trap him and all, and even using the nerf gun makes him sad. its likely he had anxiety before, and cody leaving and/or felix saying something about it could have risen it to the point of him breaking down quite a bit. i can definitely see this, even if it would be off screen, ethan breaking down infront of the other spliced letterman jocks. which again, felix, i do beg you arent stuffing things into your friends heads so they dont leave you so help me god.

and for some odd reason, even though the minion not listed that had dropped James, Justin and Louis was not named; so that leads into an unknown member of said football team; so yes, there is likely another person similar to brandon in high possibility WITH felix. he is never mentioned again, similar to brandon. not just that, may i add that evil justin knew exactly WHEN justin1 would be alone and scared. also who pulls up to a fucking fight with a literal light saber? jesus fucking christ starwars nerd get your life together. ANYWAY i dont know why evil justin holds such a grudge against nicer justin when carter clearly shows no interest in niki whatsoever; similar situation with ethan here where he's afraid of felix and he 'can't go back to cody' or 'can't get out of a bad situation'

there is so many things here that don't add up and lead Felix to be a manipulative, possessive son of a bitch behind the goofy little spiky-haired powerhungry freak we all love.

now, with brandon?? okay brandon is a REALLY really confusing character all together. all he did was tell felix the cannon was unplugged; however, devi has a theroy! ahem. so, as it said the inverted clronies clones were washed out in color without a face or any care, and were extremely weak to the point you can easily punch through them if you tried with brute strength; and you keep in mind the Granny Samantha is the Lord of Sloth it plays in mind that the cannon was never going to work, it may have NOT been the wifi, and such as. however, the trick with the fridge WAS sly but it is a sign of gluttony which is another seven deadly sin SHOCKER!! ; maybe granny samantha could pick that out easily with Justins cereal and goldfish somehow stored in his pockets…? but it was extremely EXTREMELY easy to leave it through the VERY OBVIOUSLY food chute.